Wednesday, January 31, 2007

.not writing unless TM sucks up.

i think i should stop writing. cause work and in between not having an internet connection in my house is a bitch. i got soo many things i want to write but when the time comes to write it down in the office, my mind goes blank.

i guess it's the environment in the office. it's not really as conducive for creative writing as my home pad back in johor when i was a student.

i desperately need a connection in my house if i want to continue writing long term. and TMNet's being such a bitch by not having enough ports and the location is too far... bla bla bla.. bitch.

TMNet rebranding my ass.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

.600 friends?

it's amazing how you can have more than 600+ friends in Friendster and never ever keep in touch with even one of them.

and it's even more amazing when more than half of the people you have there are people who you haven't even met.

and another quarter belongs to some dumb organization, like your school, and some fan club.

if you really are in need of friends, go out... get a life.... and get a friend. you don't need to have 600+ friends to be popular or to be known.. or even to have fun.

you just need one. and that one makes all the much difference.

i remembered when i was like 18 and looking at those friendster profiles and thinking....

"how in the blue hell did he/she get 999 friends?"
"does he/she even know all of them or are they just random add ons?"

now i know that it doesn't really matter.

all that matters is the few handful i have in my profile. and i'm pretty glad to have them there.

so, to all my friend's in my friendster profile. revel in the fact that you're all well appreciated... suckers.

to those who i don't have in my friendster profile, i still love you too.

Monday, January 29, 2007

.there's no remedy for this.

you know, the other day i was sitting around looking at the blank wall in front of me.

and i realized how much i missed her. how much i can't let go even though i said i will.

and then i put on the new movie i bought.

and i try to forget about her for a while.

but as time passes and this little flame that i have inside me grows heavier, i realize that it's not that easy to let go.

but it's not that hard too.

i just need more time.

until then, we're all friends right?

Sunday, January 28, 2007

.filler post.

can't believe i'm still working on a Sunday afternoon. WTF?

work, work, work.

but working is nice. i'm glad i have work. it's better than having nothing to do and sitting around watching birds fly around the sky.

come to think of it, that's not actually a bad idea too.

hmm... i'm torn between being a lazy bum or a hardworking ass.

Friday, January 26, 2007

.a review of the game CASHFLOW.

yesterday, me, sinfulyin, littlepeng, devildo and his friend (sorry, forgot your name... i tried.) went out to starbucks for yamcha. but we ended up playing cashflow cause they were well prepared anyway.

basically, cashflow is the brainchild of Robert Kiyosaki from "Rich Dad, Poor Dad". We play a game where it's basically a bit like life. Everyone starts of in a circle we call the rat race. then in order to get out of the rat race, we buy stocks, purchase properties that generate income and so on. however, there are bad stocks or liabilities which will decrease your cashflow. it all depends on planning and patience.

"This board game will transform the "money mind-set" of anyone who plays, whether they are new to financial information, or seasoned investors." - source

whatever it is, i think it's a good game which might not change your life yet but it will definitely stir some thoughts.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

.quote of the day.

happiness will lift you up but it is ecstacy which will make you float.

don't do drugs cause floating is for pussies. real men fly.

.a review of SAW III.

a very short review of this movie would go...

movie goes gory, lot of blood, lot of flesh, lot of pain, lot of shouting, lot of decisions to make... the end.

but i'm not going for a short review this time. it wouldn't do justice to this movie. if you haven't watched Saw and Saw II, I suggest you guys go get it first cause it's all interrelated especially in this third episode.

Jigsaw is the culprit of this movie. Throughout the first and second episode, we've seen him cultivate the will to live through the use of inhumane methods.

he's not going to the dentist, so his mum decided that this might change his mind next time.

in this third episode, we see how the decrepit jigsaw mould his successor. the only problem with his successor is that she's a killer and her jigsaw's are unsolvable. it all depends on jigsaw to rectify that.

and the biggest part of the jigsaw lies in this episode.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

.New Year Night Market.

The Lunar Chinese New Year falls on the 18th of February this year. Despite this date being 3 weeks away, a lot of preparation and shopping is being done by families and opportunity seekers alike.

Believe me, I've been getting calls from people asking me to buy firecrackers. Although I do not condone the use of illegal firecrackers, it certainly helps to brighten out the spirit of Chinese New Year.

This year must be the first year I'm in B'Worth after graduation celebrating CNY. thus I've found a lot of night markets cropping up near my housing viccinity.

This is the latest one that I've found in Raja Uda, Jalan Ong Yi How. They are not your average Pasar Malam because they cater to CNY paraphernalia only.

the venue is very much along one wide road. However, it is rectangular in shape, so you could walk from one way up till the end and you'd reach your starting point back. there's no need to go all the way and come back through the same old boring way.

the plethora of people in this place is not only fascinating but also intimidating.

they sell different kinds of foods and different kinds of stuffs.

not only chinese food, there's also sushi for the japanese fans and anime otakus.

i found the garments in this place... a little bit uncle-ish. that, or a little bit too ah beng-ish.

different types of ornaments being sold. i especially liked the spiraling light.

a lot of shit until i can't even classify them

btw, bibi says hi.

basically, that was one hour's worth of walk which i found nothing. the place was quite interesting but nothing that would attract me and make me part with my money.

during the 1 hour walk i was constantly grumbling about how the walk hurts my feet and mom got fed up of my groaning. haha! besides my stomach was soooo full that i could hardly walk.

.filler post.

life is a big fuck up ruckus now. i need to go out more! work rawks and life needs a little of spice to rawk again!

Monday, January 22, 2007

.mirage of personalities.

we all need and crave for some kind of recognition in this world. whether it's from family or friends. we're all the same. we all need someone or somebody to know us for who we are and what we are.

but we're actually not portraying that in our everyday life. every little detail that we portray today is a mirage and a compilation of different personas.

we emulate people all around us all the time. like that friend who sat beside you during your school days, or that teacher which you adore so much. or even the movie star that you watch every night for the remaining six seasons.

so, as we compile these different personas that we emulate, how should we know which one is really us?

there's a real easy way to counter the effect. we all feel safest when we're with the one we love the most. be it with our family or our best group of friends, our real self will prevail cause all other niceties that we portray and emulate are useless against these bunch of people who has stick by our sides for a big part of our lives.

have you ever wondered why you consciously comb your hair one way or the other?
and when you're in the presence of family members, nothing really matters, not even the amount of dirt you have on your shirt? or how tussled your hair looks like?

cause you know the people who love you the most won't judge you by what you look like or what you portray. they've known you well enough no matter how many layers of niceties you wrap around yourself. and they will still stick by your side even if you're a little dirty on the outside.

it's in the presence of people who we know will judge us that we are more conscious.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

.quote of the day.

for your first relationship, you rush in with love.

for your second relationship, you rush in with experience.

for your third relationship, you rush in with wisdom.

.blood diamond - not much of a review.

i don't want to write a long review here.

two words.

must watch.

especially with dicaprio and his african accent.

and jennifer connelly! wow!

the cast did a great job, the storyline was engaging. the ending was perfect.

Friday, January 19, 2007

.filler post.

no mood to blog. later. bye.

ps: loving someone is letting go and making sure she's not sad. at least not because of you.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

.sleepy dwarf.

my eyes are all messed up. not having enough sleep can kill i tell you.
but i guess it's all worth it.

i went to meet up with sinfulyin, cherryling divablay and happyhelen (came with buddhabf and newzieSteven)

yeah, divablay recently came back from aussie and decided to meet up so she can give us some presents. she got us the usual koala which i was sooo fucking sick of, i decided that i'd go for the sweets instead. better two edible stuffs than 1 more of those useless koalas. i guess it'd make a perfect gift if you've never gone to aus before. or you've never known anyone from aus before.

dun get me wrong divablay, i lurrrrve the koala... but after looking at it for the millionth time, it's time to let go. maybe someone will appreciate it better, which is why i din choose it.

see how good and thoughtful i am?


a year ago i didn't know which state port dickson was.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

.for you.

I soooo need a break from you.
but at the same time, i dun want to be without you.

life with you is beautiful but at the same time sooo full of uncertainties.

I try and try to stop myself from reaching for that phone,
but my mind is not as powerful as my heart.

my mind tell me it's wrong, but my heart tells me it's for you.

everything is for you.

P/S: i need to be a poet. or at least a song writer.. or something along the line of creative arts. i sooo have the knack for it.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

.lightning rod vs cave.

i soooo want to post pictures but i have problems with uploading my pictures to the pc from my hp for a while now...

so resulting in the past few weeks/months' pictureless posts.

sorry yeah.

bumbleelay is back from aus. her trip lasted for one and a half month. damn, that's like a long time to stay overseas ok?

but sponsored by bf there is so nice i guess. food and accomodation provided for.

jelesnya aku.

tofuny, if i go there, will you provide me with the same perks?
i mean, we are friends for like.... +/- 19 years and counting.

19 fucking years is damn long ok?
nvm.. i know you're giving me the middle finger now.

no wonder they say, the power of a lightning rod is nothing in a cave.
if you don't get it, don't bother... i ain't gonna explicitly explain it to you.

ps: i completed The Star's Sudoku for today. Sudoku makes me miss her.

Monday, January 15, 2007

.quote of the day.

science is advanced witchcraft.

witchcraft is crude science.

.today in my life.

work load is increasing these few days. i kinda like it in a way.

am i the go get them, cannot sit tight, die die also must move kinda guy?

dunno. sometimes i like lazying around in the house too. heck, most of the times i enjoy the company of my bed, my quilt and my television (with dvd player).

Somehow, 10th of February seem like a long time to wait. ;)


oh, yeah.. yesterday i took baby up to my room and left her there while i went to bathe. after my night bath, i stepped out of the bathroom to the smell of shit.

yes, she shitted in my room. which resulted in baby getting her ass kicked. for a while.

then i can't stand her "cute cute look at me i can die" face, so i decided to sayang her back.

i know, i'm gonna make a lousy disciplinarian.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

.the grunt of a pig in a bus ride.

fucking grunt pig son of a bitch.

you know the worst thing a person could ever receive on a bus? the passenger from hell right beside you.

i bought my fucking SUPER VIP tickets. i mean, really super vip. which means i'm supposed to be some very super fucking important person to be able to sit in that bus.


it seems that people with the nose size of a dead pig can embark on the same journey in the same vehicle as me. oh, the misery... the catastrophy.

oh, forgot to mention.. those fucking SVIP tickets.. they cost a lil bit more than usual cause they're supposed to be the best dolt buses around the vicinity. screw them, i'm never buying a ticket with the same fucking alphabets.

my trip to KL was plagued by a disease called "fucking pig beside me snoring like bomb"

i sat down in my spot and was ready to get some shut eye. cause ya know, getting SVIP tickets and not enjoying the ride home in a deep slumber is dumb. i'd rather get school bus tickets if i don't actually sleep.

kidding. but anyway. i was sitting there, closing my eye and for the first 15 minutes, it was fine.

Suddenly, this male pig bitch beside my seat started snoring like a fucking bomb was about to explode in his nose. i think it was EXPLODING. i wouldn't mind the normal rhythm snores but his was ecstasy. some times, you get the normal rhythm and after a few snores... he'd snore like he was suffocating.

snort, snort, phewwww...., snort, snort, pheww and.... SNOOOOOORRRRTT.

fucking shit.

i was shocked not to mention the least. i mean, who wouldn't be shocked by a real human sized pig snore right beside them.

"ok.." i thought to myself.

maybe i can insulate the noise with my MP3 player.

i put on my ipod and push the volume max. i can still hear the distinct sound of his snoring but i was thinking it could be bearable.

boy, as soon as the music was transiting from one to the other, the snort comes back to live. like a fucking rock concert.

after around 15 minutes, i couldn't stand it and bitch slapped him. after that i asked him to stay awake for the benefit of the people in Kazakhstan.

kidding. but i did move my place up to the front row. there was no one there.

i pity the people around the vicinity.

.not your usual response right?

"ding dong"

that's the sound of my handphone notifying me of incoming message.

i took it out from my right pocket and unlocked it. then i clicked on the view msg button.

it's her. i think to myself.

after reading her message, i clicked reply.

then as i was typing halfway. i noted a roadblock less than 500 meters in front.

any sane person's first instinct would be to close the hp and continue later.

but i don't know why. my instinct gave me a different perspective today.

it told me...

"type faster, type faster"

KNN, got police in front and here i was sitting in my car, my left hand on the steering and my right clicking like i was in a thumbtyping competition.
my foot never gave up the pedal position.

as i zoomed closer to the police, i managed to send it just in the nick of time.

they used their big torchlight and scanned my car for extraterrestrial beings and microchips.

i act nonchalant.

they wave me pass.

i gave a big sigh of relief. and i started breathing again.

see, it's not the amount of breaths in life that matter. it's the amount of times that takes your breath away.

Friday, January 12, 2007

.quote of the day.

Prediction is divided into two.

a lucky guess or an analytical conclusion based on observation.


i was soooooo looking forward to friday cause i know saturday and sunday's gonna be a bomb. (HOLIDAY!)

but i'm booked for work tomorrow. nevermind lar. fuck it lar.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

.quote of the day.

there's a fine line between a perfectionist and a bitch.

that fine line is called hierarchy.

if you're higher than them, they're perfectionists.
if you're lower, they're bitches.

.back from holiday.

in the short period of time i was not here, i've watched two movies. so... i'm too lazy to do a review of both now. maybe sometime later.

here's what i had on my vacation.

i had a wonderful time with two long lost friends on the first day. but going out shopping with them is such a bitch.

i had sushi buffet. which stuffed my tummy like explosive nitrogen shoved into my nose.

i watched two movies.

i had breakfast. yummy.

i had lunch too. yummy.

i played sudoku.. for the first time. ;)
i'm beginning to love sudoku. but i guess it's only because she loves it too.
i can't do shit with sudoku. my brain kinda freezes up with all those numbers. gotta brush up.

i had big ass dinner in yew's cafe. the place is nice. ambience and food. four star rated. i even like the waiter and waitress there cause they so remind me of myself when i was serving in pulai spring. hehe. pro... man.

i killed someone's computer and had the freaking PRIVILEGE to reformat it for him. as if i'm like so happy to do it. that bitch really got me there.

i know of a secret stash of wonderful songs.

i had her beside me and that's all that matters.

emo right?

fuck it lar... *continues to click publish*

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Friday, January 5, 2007

.filler post.

you know you're a certified nerd when you can work the computer with ease without a fucking mouse.

i'm doomed.

.courtesy is reflective.

the atmosphere is a bit tensed.

as i sat in the corner of the bank waiting corner, i noticed an old lady looking agitated.

everyone was especially quiet. i guess it's normal in a bank. but this time, it's especially quiet for a different reason.

the old lady was shouting at the bank teller and the bank supervisor.

i noticed that in the service industry, we meet a plethora of different types of people. some courteous, some agitating.

but usually, it's the auntie or uncle who make up a big fuss. we all have our customer rights, yes, but waiting is not an unusual dilemma for someone about to take a loan for a car. maybe a second hand car cause she managed to shout "if i buy a new car, i don't need to pay a single cent."

i believe she has met people who were exactly like her. whether she was the one affected or she was the one looking on, she should know better than to raise her voice.

we all have our own different ways of resolving conflict. some act nonchalant (as in the case of the bank teller and the bank supervisor), some become agitated, others just shout and wail (as in the case of the auntie).

it's not what you become right? it's who you are that determine your actions.

from her actions, we know what type of person she is.... so to all those who's reading this, keep calm at all times... unless you want to look like a scowling bitch at the receiving end of a bad sex day.

.filler post.

someone commented on my post regarding why my design is different from the chinese newspaper dated 3rd January 2007. Honestly, I can't find that comment nor that post which he/she commented in.

If anyone can point out what the hell he/she is talking about, please clarify.

Tuesday, January 2, 2007

.recap of 2006.

here's a recap of what happened in 2006.

i freaking presented my thesis. and to my relief, it happened just as i imagined it will. except for some questions which like came spoofing from god knows where. sometimes, it's hard explaining the concepts and the ideas that you have to lecturers. that's because they have a certain expectation and a certain guideline to how and what you can do in a thesis.

they know better, i guess.

i didn't get the grades i expected but i was really happy with my grade, probably because i know that with more effort i can achieve better.

sometimes regret is such a bitch.

quitting my job.
i quit my job in johor so that i can come back to penang and you know... rest a while.. maybe like three months. the sad part about quitting this job is that the job was soooo much fun. i enjoyed teaching those kids. and those adults too. i made a lot of friends in that short time i taught. some older, some younger. but we're all cool.

i sooo miss them.

graduation was like the moment i've been waiting for the whole 5 years in UTM. however, it wasn't really fantastic or anything. i blame the stupid costume which made me look like some batman wannabe... or some hongkie mafia according to aileen.
i think graduations are overrated. i prefer the slumber in classes and the carefree life i had in uni.
graduation in my opinion is a big bunch of photo taking session. you take photos during and after the graduation. the ceremony was a big letdown cause they never announced the name... i hate the freaking UTM for spoiling that one important moment in every participating student's life.

break up.
i don't want to talk about this but i think it's best for the both of us.

the interviews.
got my first preliminary rounds of interviews. they were intimidating at first but as times pass by, it's getting easier and easier. maybe because i'm more prepared for it. or maybe because i'm bored of it.

my job.
got my first job here in the company. the expectations are high and i plan to make the company big. i just need some time to familiarize myself with the management and technical aspects before i venture further. they say ambition can kill if you're not careful.

my baby.
my lovable cuddly dog. i love her to bits.

my wife.
my car is taking up most of my money. i guess installments are a bitch.

my friends.
you know, there are some friends which you can't mix more than you can handle and there are friends who you wished you spent more time with. i learnt this only this year. i've always thought i can adapt to all kind of friends. but i guess it's only wishful thinking on my part. but i'm glad to say that i'm comfortable in the company of friends i have now. they're the best.

my family.
2006 was the most influential and mind changing year in regards to family affairs. i've learnt to appreciate them more. and know that nothing matters more than family ties. in the small circle of friendship that we have in a family, i can take solace in the fact that they will always be there when i need a place to fall back to.

goodbye 2006... and welcome a more promising 2007.

.random lessons.

When we look down, we know how big we are. When we look up, we realize how small we are. When we look in front, we see the obstacles and l...