Tuesday, October 28, 2008

.minor updates.

1. i finished the final episodes of TVB series Four and Last One Standing. I know, my life sucks. Yours are all da bomb wtf who cares.

2. Played futsal and sprained my knee. So dumb wtf. Then proceeded to AutoCity with Jack and Ajepz for lepak lepak borak borak. Saw Raymond Lam there wtf never sing also.

3. Celebrated JollyJules' birthday and NottyNit leaving Malaysia migrating to Thai lol wtf its so not true. Met up with lots of ex schoolmates. Haven meet them for like one day. But prior to Raya, it was like 8 years. Among the people who were cool enough to get RSVP invitations are Hajar, Hajar + 1 (Anas) Maizatul, Aen, Aen + 1 (Rudy), Khoo, Khoo + 1 (Kelly), Khairul, Nit, Mars, Jules, Seng, Me (lazy to change name wtf who cares). After the party, a few of us headed over to AutoCity and then back to McDonalds until 4 am.

4. Deepavali was full. Thanks to Privina and Thanes. No usual open house at Puva's place though wtf miss the food.

Next week, my reports from KL hopefully with pictures this time k?

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

.my maskara.

I'll be in KL on November the 1st for Maskara Shorties.

Maskara shorties is one of those things we feel could never be as good as foreign production. But its good, done by many great people with so much talent that they sometimes scare me.

Give them a chance, let's together-gether rock this place.

but first of all, anyone by any chance know a real easy way to go to RUMAH PENA?


it has been a rough week. troubles are brewing and work is piling endlessly.
I felt like everything just went wrong on Monday and Tuesday... and today.

Work was not done in time, deadlines were not met... somehow, it felt like university. it felt like one of those days when things go bad and turns worse. except we expect it to get better and it always does. not this time.

this time, things just kept getting worse. its like seeing a falling plate. things go slow and you somehow know you've slipped but no matter how you fling your hand trying to stop the momentum, hoping in some miracle way you could catch it before it hits the ground... you fail. and today i felt that certain helplessness.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

.dictionary of faces.

Fuckface (adj)
1. A person with a penis for his nose and is of such hideous origin that even his mother abandoned him. Usually applied to the male gender only.
2. A facial expression utilized during sexual intercourse.
3. A person of great inconvenience to mankind and a waste of nature's resources. Generally he is an environmental pollution.

E.G. "Hey, fuckface... get out of my fucking way before I bitchslap you from here to China."

Dickhead (adj)
1. Usually denotes a bald man with elongated necks enabling him to ejaculate spit by thrusting his neck up and down.
2. A relatively unknown person who you have just met and has a great distaste towards.
3. A very ugly person.

E.G. "That dickhead just made a move on your girl mate"

Cumface (adj)
1. A very ugly and hideous person whom you have a distaste towards.
2. Usually a female person with male jizz on her face. Sometimes due to the act of Bukake.
3. A person with facial features resembling the freezing face you make when you cum.

E.G. "You were born with a cumface Ali. Its nothing to be ashamed of, we all have it. Yours is just... urm... permanent."

Friday, October 17, 2008

.you know?

you know when guys pee. they flush. and then they pee that tidbit again...
and they can't flush?
what to do then?

you know when you go to a public toilet, and there's people at the other cubicle.
you pee to the sides of the wall so that the other person wouldn't listen on you.
cause then they'd know how many times your dumb brain THOUGHT you were finished peeing.

you know when the car crashes. and the air bag pops out?
that feeling of being shoved into an air bag?
i wish those were breasts. wouldn't that be great?
i'd call them breastbags.

you know when you take a bath with your wife/gf to enhance your sexual relationship?
girls would think its awesome and all.
you'd both be back massaging, rubbing soaps all over.
its all romantic and sensual.
until the guy pees.

guys pee while bathing all the time.
no, they can control it... they just choose not to.

some girls on the other hand... take the time to sit down on the toilet bowl after bathing.
others just squat down.
don't think she's giving you a blowjob just cause she's squatting.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

.my country.

it is with a sad heart as i watch the political proceedings of this country. we have progressed for 51 years and although I've seen our share of turmoil and tragedy, none is as disheartening as these past few months.

thinking back, I've witnessed the highlands tragedy, tsunami, reformasi during Anwar's detention, 1997 economic turmoil among the many. however, these past few months we've witnessed stones unturned. what was once hidden and damp under those stones are being shown light once again. greed and lust is empowering but the faces are being identified. we've succesfully put faces to these words. i believe with great power comes greater greed. i am no exception. i do not blame our government for such abuse of power, i blame the people for letting them be too comfortable in their seats.

the unlawful detention of a chinese reporter and MP Teresa Kok was uncalled for. it was a disgrace to Malaysia. It was a time of pure darkness when people thought all freedom and justice is being contorted. our freedom felt like it lived in small boxes donated to us out of generosity, it was a keeping, not a right. the detention of RPK was necessary for the government as they deem him as a threat. He was sharp and he spoke his mind. A double edged sword. However, no human who have not killed or planned to kill another human being should be detained with prejudice and without trial.

now, we've reached another stage of dark times. with the economic turmoil and the political uncertainty, it seems like the person who will be at helm could be another face we put "not only" to the words greed and lust but also to the word conspirator. evil at times like this flourish.
at present time of writing, he is still taking his time. press conferences are answered in dodgy manners, questions are being answered with more questions.

"What do you think/see?"
"Was there anything conclusive?"
"Was there anything pointing to abuse of power?"

Nothing is conclusive. but the people is not blind. We see you at the helm one day and we are scared. Not only because we have labeled you as all of the above but because of who we imagine will be in power and calling the shots. they say birds of a feather flock together right?

and then there is also the calling of the unwise spending of money. the sum is not HUGE or ABYSMAL but it mattered at a time when the world is dark. You seem to have no qualms pumping money out of the country at an excess than what is needed. Was it worth it? Was your greed empowering? Did you think no one would find out like all the other times? Did it feel good pocketing all those money and looking at our country fall? They say a civilized and well-mannered society starts with the family. I think it starts with a man... it starts in small components because these small components blend together to make a country. Did you put yourself before the country?

You broke our heart and although we might've misjudged you, we might've wrongly accused you... It didn't matter what we want, you are just not ready to give up all those power yet for the country. You will fight through right? You will fight tooth and nail for power.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

.wrong side of the bed.

waking up at 6 is not really my forte. I tried to force my eyes but it seems to have a will on its own.

and then its 7.

Saturday, October 11, 2008


go watch if you like the tv series.
damn nice wtf but the ending makes it impossible to have "KAMI 2" the way I would've loved it.

KAMI the movie trailer
Mawar Khayalan by Laila's Lounge
Pari Pari Di Bawah Angin by Meet Uncle Hussain

support local production. get original. they're quite good actually. serious.

p/s: I'm looking for Sepi and Cinta. If you have it, pls pls PLS do tell me.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

.things that baffle me.

Part 3.

continuation from part 1 and part 2.

facebook whores who spends all their time playing nonsensical java games.
who the fuck does this anymore? fess up. personally i think facebook is overrated. networking or no shit, they give people the illusion that we can interact and high-five each other or throw chickens at each other without any eye contact. we can even lick all our friends wtf. what the dumbfuck kinda interaction is that?

we all think facebook is the platform where we can start all over again fresh from friendster. with all those albums and shit. well, guess what... i think the albums are nice. but the games? the games which you keep inviting me 10 times over and over? there's a reason why i declined them in the first place piehole. now i don't even look at my invites. i dun want to play medieval warrior or pokemon adventure. heck i dont even want to enter your group of "Feed a child with a click" shit. cant you get it through your fucking thick skull?

people who dont answer their calls and dont call back.
whats the use of a fucking handphone if you don't pick it up? fine, if you're like bathing, masturbating. having sex with your dog. i totally understand your predicament but at least have the fucking decency to call back after you're done with whatever sexual activity you have. i called you for a reason and although the reason might be to talk bullshit, but i fucking CALLED you to talk about bullshit. see how important that is?

Taiwanese Hokkien Movies.
I believe every living auntie who's above 45 years old and who doesn't have a life would definitely love the series. But seriously, I cant stomach it. And I have to sit in for it every fucking day from 6 to 7 pm cause my grandma's been hogging for it and demanding i switched it on every fucking day. Even on fucking Saturdays and Sundays, she wants to make sure. I never really bothered with it last time cause I would really just skip it. But now, it's taking over my 6 to 7 pm and causing me endless headaches with their poor acting and silly accents. And all those fucking guys in the fucking movie somehow have their slick hair combed back every fucking series. And their language... oh my fucking god... how could they put that on TV. btw, I'm hokkien but you don't see Singaporean Hokkien sounding like a lame arse.

Fucking MLM and Direct Sales.
They give you this bullshit talk about having your own business and running your own profits and all kinds of enterprenual bullshit but the fact of the matter is, you're selling someone's fucking product and working for them for a percentage of their income. It's a small fucking percentage believe me, no matter what pudgy fucking bullshit they try to shove down your throat. Its all OK, I buy stuffs from MLM and direct sales. Hell my mom was involved in numerous shits like these. But the fact of the matter is, they're fucking annoying like facebook invites... they keep coming on and on with the invites wtf.

DSLR owners calling themselves a professional photographer.
every fucking person holding a DSLR are calling themselves professional photographers. Just because they can do some editing on Photoshop and take countless amount of digital pictures and selecting the best ones. fucking retards have no training, have no art sense, have nothing. they just click and choose. it helps that the images are of damn quality and it helps that the print outs are kinda free (no need for film wtf).

end note.
if you feel offended, just press Alt + F4. Bye my filthy bitch.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

.guling atau gulung?

"You tak tau siapa DancingDodi?" tanya HappyHunny.

"Dah tak ingat" jawab aku.

HappyHunny cuba menjelaskan ciri-ciri yang mungkin membolehkan aku ingat kembali kawan aku ini. Aku cuba, tetapi tidak berjaya.

Dia berkata lagi, "She's quite chubby?"

Aku tak tahu kenapa tapi imej "sebelum" dalam iklan langsing badan muncul dalam fikiran aku.

"Oh... patutlah aku tak ingat" jawab aku.

"DancingDodi tinggal dekat ngan KL aje. Tiup pun sampai."

"Betul ka? Kalau aku tiup tak sampai.. aku gulungkan dia ke KL." aku gelak.

"Gulung?" tanya HappyHunny. Kemudian dia ketawa terbahak-bahak, "You mean guling. Ko ingat dia permaidani ke?".

Aku rasa dari telefon ajaibnya, dia tahu muka aku merah malu. Dia gelak lagi. Tak berhenti-henti dan semakin kuat. Aku tunggu hingga keadaan reda, sampai HappyHunny teresak-esak dengan ketawanya.

Kemudian aku meneruskan perbualan dalam Bahasa Inggeris.

Monday, October 6, 2008

.nama kereta.

Hari itu aku berjalan dengan AbsolutAlvin.

Dia bertanya aku "You namakan kereta you Suzie?"

Aku menjawab "Brand dia Suzuki jadi singkatannya Suzie lar. Bukannya nama spesial pun."

Alvin gelak tersengih.

Tapi dalam hati, aku teringin nak panggil kereta aku Shadow atau Macho, mungkin jugak ZimMobile ala Batmobile.

Aku tekan kekunci kereta "tik tak" dan kami masuk ke dalam ZimMobile. Mana butang eject untuk passenger tepi?

.random lessons.

When we look down, we know how big we are. When we look up, we realize how small we are. When we look in front, we see the obstacles and l...