healthy masturbation and wadlympics.

i read with great interest about my lipeng's blog entitled.. "masturbation... healthy or not??? debate on this..."

i read and i read and i read... only to discover that her whole blog entry is about her life and only one PARAfuckingGRAPH is devoted to the topic.

and there's this whole other paragraphs devoted to her life lar, tokyo drift lar and many more..

so, let me plagliarize her topic a bit....

masturbation. first of all let us define what is masturbation.

Male: The act of stroking up and down with mechanical expression and a lot of visual stimulant.

Female: The act of inserting a certain item into the vaginal hole (add lubricant). After this, the certain participant must engage in an act of push and pull to increase sensual experience. A lot of imaginative effort will occur here.

Now, let us define what happens after masturbation or why we masturbate.

Male / Female : Orgasm (sensual pleasure)

Such sensual pleasure will certainly lead to a happier life because believe it or not... people who are happy actually think clearer and smile more.

Smile is infectious, once a person smiles at you, smile back. This cycle continous until the magic reaches a dumb, sulky person who did not had sex and do not know how to masturbate. DUMBO.

Masturbation releases tension? that's actually true in a way.. not the tension you get from work or headache kinda tension... it's the tension you get before you erupt. you should get what i mean.

So... tell me why isn't masturbation good? in fact i think we should all have a masturbation day. kinda like labour's day or valentine's day. everyone get together to shoot a lot of wad. nations can even have a wadlympics where there will be a competition.

loorgasm: whoever can have the longest orgasm

time attack: shoot your wad in the shortest possible time.

wadathlon : the most times a person can masturbate in a certain time span.

high jump : highest shooting wad possible.

pin point shooting : shoot the bullseye with your wad.

sperm count : most sperms in a drop of wad.

i'm too tired to think of more.. all of these is making me woozy... suggestions?
June 19, 2006


Anonymous said…
rotflmao..Jimmy the Wanker
Mike Stewart said…
Actually they have a whole month (May) which is designated National Masturbation Month...but as another blogger brilliantly put it "It's always May in my pants!" As Woody Allen said in "Annie Hall", "Don't knock masturbation! It's sex with someone I love!" Right on Woody!
Jimmy Ang said…
ken : hey, don't disrespect the wanker... it's Mr. Wanker to you.

horny old guy : brilliantly said. long live WOODY!
Samantha said…
haha i'd say "long live JIMMY!"...hmmm it ryhmes huh? lolz wahahaha


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