Wednesday, December 31, 2008

.2008 to 2009.

My 2008 New Year Resolution - reviewed.

1. forgot all the stressful shit at work and focus on the results. not the process... even if the process sucks.
- SUCCESS. I'm less stressful now.
2. never bring work back home.
- guilty but successful to a certain degree. It's rare but occasionally I do.
3. have fun working and work at your own time at your own pace.
- Less working more time. Need to improve on this.
4. look like you're having fun and laugh like you mean it.
- I always have FUN. The laughing part... see below.
5. never look down on people's jokes... always laugh like you mean it.
- kinda hard when it doesn't tickle. fail.
6. be confident, i may not know what bullshit i'm talking about but i'm sure i know how to bullshit out of it.
- SUCCESSFUL.
7. never take any bull from any other person other than your boss... cause you're not paid high enough to take bull from your customers.
- i am still tolerant but so far no one's gone over the line yet.
8. have fun and never resist fun when it comes knocking.
- guilty of turning things down due to some boring ppl. need to find crazy mofo friends.
9. get out more and look-see the world more.
- still working on the financial part.
10. learn to love better.
- FAIL.


Things I did in 2008.

1. Bought my new car.
2. Failed to go to the Jay Chou World Tour because of "idiot" friends. Yes, that means MiniVin, JollyYeap and SillySeng. Of course I'm one too.
3. went to Bangkok. Almost called a hooker.
4. had a nightmare meeting net friends at 12.30 am.
5. Lost a dog, adopted another.
6. had an accident with two breastbags popping out.
7. met up with Hani at KL after like soo many years.
8. lost SweetSam.
9. went to Maskara Shorties with so many of my ex-classmates.
10. Gambling @ Genting. Lame but my first time. My virgin experience.

My 2009 Resolution.

1. Earn more. (take up part time jobs and take them seriously.)
2. Meet more people. (attend more gatherings. Be friendly)
3. Go more places. (travel to a destination every 3 months)
4. Workout more. (30 minutes on workouts everyday. Be consistent)
5. Sleep more. (Sleep on weekdays by 12.00 maximum)

There... simple, easy and nice.

Have a blessed New Year and Happy Holidays.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

.my kicks.

What do you do when you feel bored and poor? Sulking about the economy and shit?

Secretly, I'm a shopaholic.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

.gempa bumi.

Kita berempat bermain poker diatas kerusi "siap bina" piknik budak budak. jenis yang boleh dibawa ke taman dan dibuka dan dipasang.

Meja itu tak tulis ada had berat pun. Apa lagi? Kita berempat pun bermain Texas Hold-Em Poker atas meja piknik kecil itu.

Gua ada dua kad, Satu 3 dan satu lagi K. Memang tipis peluang aku untuk menang.

Tapi atas meja ada kad "3,6,3,3,Q".

Kesimpulannya. Kad gua kad yang terbesar. Kebarangkalian ada orang yang lebih besar dari gua memang tak ada.

Apa lagi, gua pun mengambil peluang ini melatah semua bet yang ada dalam meja. Gua up lagi dengan RM250.

Budak itu terkedut kedut ikut. Mungkin dia ada kad Q yang terbesar. Entah lah. Tapi gua yakin.

Gua pun buka kad gua dan menunjukkan kad gua. Memang sah gua menang.

Tiba tiba ada gempa bumi.

Di saat kemenangan terhebat gua, gempa bumi menyebabkan kerusi gua patah.

Diorang kata gua paling gemuk. Tidak, gua tak percaya. Memang gempa bumi.

Diam diam gua menyimpan kerusi "siap bina" piknik budak budak itu. Tapi dalam perjalanan balik gua ala senyap seperti James Bond menimbang diri. 72kg. Gua nak body seperti Nicole ritchie lepas ini. Paling banyak 35 kg saja. Amacam, masa itu.. mesti orang tak samakan gua dengan badan Jack Black lagi.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

.MMG FRESH.

NottyNit came back for Christmas eve, so we decided that we must gather around all our ex-classmates and have a reunion for Christmas Eve.

The problem with a reunion on a Christmas Eve is that every freaking place in Penang which is hip and happening is ... Full, Packed, Jammed, F-ed up... whatever.

So we squeezed our head to think of a place and gathered suggestions from everyone.
We were at the brink of absolute decision when HippyHajar texted NottyNit saying that she knows this freaking place with fishes "yang MMG FRESH".

Tadaa..... (ignore those dirty empty dishes. we were hungry. waited an hour and more for the food)

i was standing awkwardly because it's hard squeezing into a 10 cm space.






Standing: Zimmy and HippyHajar.
Sitting: JollyYeap, AbsolutAen, MasterMai, NottyNit

Standing: HippyHajar and Hubby.
Sitting: Zimmy, AbsolutAen, MasterMai, NottyNit


Tak sangka classmates ako tinggal 5 sahaja. Yang lagi satu tu hubby HippyHajar. Minivin tak datang. Minivin gatal, pergi tengok "ip man". XD

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

.blah.

*blah* post deleted. too lazy to write anything meaningful. life's been such a bore.

tomorrow might be different though. *-^

Sunday, December 21, 2008

.experience books.

my next few few weeks of night will be filled with these two reads:

Anne Frank, The Diary of a Young Girl

The Devil's Right Hand Man, The True Story of Serial Killer Robert C Browne

i'm not intellectual, in fact i think i'm far from it. but reading gives me a chance to imagine and experience. it might not be something i experience but through other people's experience i learn about things.

Small things like the way the streets of New York light up during the night. The view from Maldives. The distant sound of a wolf's cry. Maybe even the thinking of a girl abused physically and emotionally.

Sometimes I learn about love and I learn how to appreciate love. I learn to love the blue skies during an early morning, the smell of fresh cut grass and the taste of fresh plucked tomatoes from the gardens of Guangdong.

There are so many things to learn about this world. And I try to learn them in the confined space of my bedroom with the dimly lit table lamp bought from Ikea.

p/s: I'm waiting for my Ganador Titan Rouge. Its a straight thru and I'll lose some midrange but increased pick-up as well as increased top speed at high range. Hopefully, the midrange will not be significant or I'll be forced to add a semi flow midbox. Or I'll maybe add a silencer to add some backpressure. BTW, its a custom purchase with a 4" tip.

Friday, December 19, 2008

.new wing and sneakers.

there's this new wing opened at Gurney Plaza and I've been wanting to go visit it since forever... except that it only opened up a couple of months ago but it really felt like forever. anyway, i've heard about the nike specialty store there from BBB and since Christmas, NY and CNY is coming... I've been meaning to change these two year old sneakers of mine.

It's still in pristine condition but heck, a guys gotta walk too. I am willing to part with my pristine Nike Light Blue and White sneakers for RM980.00. It has brought me to many places and i think i've clocked around 9000 km on it. Interested offers can pls email me jimmyang[at]hotmail.com. No lowballers.

I've been conned by these white lovely babies of k-swiss. Mind you they're not k-fed, only Britney spears got conned by K-fed... twice. I mean, which idiot would step into the same shit two times? Nvm. I'm interested in the last image utmost right. i'm no lover of high dunks.


My interest in Onitsukas are beginning to wear off. Mostly because I'm not liking their available designs here in Malaysia.

Now let's hook up at Gurney new wing this weekend. Cya.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

.mundane life.

ok, nothing much happened in my mundane 2d fucking life. I mean, how fucking good can my life be when I'm working 6 days a week. What with everybody getting pubic hairs all over the economy outlook, I am only grateful to say that I'm trying to cut down on my expenses. My fucking company is also trying to cut down expenses. The only thing is.. they haven't resorted to downsizing.

One of my mates decided to get married. They've registered for the past 3 years if I'm not mistaken and the wedding ceremony was only conducted last week.

Also, tomorrow will be CheezelKas' last day in the company. She will be missed but I guess going off to study her degree is much better than staying put in the company. Can this be considered voluntary downsizing? XD

Yeah, looking at this fucking anal economy everyone is complaining about... I hereby wish everyone a Merry fucking Christmas and have a happy fucking New Year.

I need to go shopping. Here's to my salary and no fucking bonus. I think the economy fuck-up is just an excuse for my company to squeeze out my bonus.

Fuck you brainless shit running Citibank and GM and whatever shit company that closed down or needs bailing from the US government. You're useless. Go fly your dick.

p/s: I need a holiday but I'm out of Annual Leave.WTF.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

.stupid Prakash.

An idiot came into my office from Seri Boogies V*ntures (Prakash).. shouting about why our office called him twice or three times asking him to pay RM90.

He was going "Kenapa you orang call I banyak kali har? Cakap sekali cukup lah. I hutang you RM90 bukan RM90,000".

I was agitated but maintained calm. "You hutang RM90 tapi belum bayar lagi, jadi kita pun call lar"

He said the magic word "You ingat I tak boleh ingat ke? You ingat I bodoh ke?"

I was soooo fucking tempted to say "Ya". But then I was thinking maybe after that explosion he wouldn't pay. So I asked him "So, sekarang you nak bayar?".

He took out his wallet and I let it slide. He was standing there complaining about how we're all making a fuss over RM90.

I let it slide and sat down.

You may think of me as a wuss but I thought it was harder for me to let it go than any other thing I could have ever done. I could've quarrelled with him or I could've just said "Kalau tak puas hati, tak payah bayar. Boleh blah. You ingat kita nak you punya RM90 ka?"

But walking away was the right thing to do.

I REALLY REALLY WANTED TO SAY "YES" WHEN HE ASKED ME "YOU INGAT I BODOH KA?".

So many things were going in my head for that one question.

Among the good answers were:

"Ya, I memang ingat you bodoh"
"Tidak, I ingat you terencat."
"Maybe your mom didn't teach you well. It's ok."
"Inherited?"
"Evolution boy, yours seem stunted"

Kenapa... I tak bagitau dia?

Sunday, December 14, 2008

.Klang Rendezvous.

Peter's wedding at Klang.

Gua pakai gaya "Wong Fei Hung". AstroArif pakai gaya "P.Ramlee + Mawi". LassyLeng pakai gaya "Aishwarya Rai".

Kita bertiga agak menyesal kerana mereka yang lain pakai ala kadar aje. Tapi tidak apa, kita bertiga ada gaya, mutu, keunggulan.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

.stuffs.

When darkness comes, it consumes and eats. And in total darkness we hold on to the hope of light not because we want to be saved but because we simply want hope. We know deep within our hearts that without hope, our hearts die.

But hope makes us want. Want makes us covet. Covet creates greed. Greed makes the world dark.

I shall not hope, nor want, nor covet. I shall have.

-jimmy ang-

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

.fashion cons.

Gua sekarang tidak lagi "ngam" dengan baju L.

Gua sekarang bersaiz "XL".

Ini bukan kerana gua semakin gemuk.
Ini kerana industri fesyen cuba menipu kita dengan menukar standard size mereka.

Gua tertipu kerana hari ini gua ingin sangat NAK "diet".

-----------------------------------

BTW, I'm back from KL. It was hectic. I slept at 2.35 am yesterday.

The whole journey was filled with raindrops pitter-pattering on my windscreen. Its amazing how rain can last for 2 whole days. I wish there were more sunny days cause rainy days just makes me yawn.

Now I have an important decision to make.

Friday, December 5, 2008

.morning dew.

it's 6.00 am, I turn my head from left to right.

The morning dew is still fresh. I sat up and thought about the morning to come. It will be long.

I moved to the corner of the bed, switched on my ipod, covered myself under the warm blanket and let the music sway me back so that the day won't be any longer than it has to be.

Manhattan morning image from pinchmysalt.com

p/s: She said I'm a sweet talker and I'd write great love letters. It made me want to write her one.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday MiniVin. Kthnxbai.

Been busy these couple of days. Some of you might notice, the blog header is gone. I was thinking of making a new one but work and outings got the better of me.

Some updates:
I was in Penang with my Swift Kakis last Friday. Saw KayaKhairul having coffee with his mom. Awww so sweet.
I watched BOLT with Nurul last Sat.
I met AlvinNotChipmunk, TeachingCC and TeachingWP at Jusco Bandar Perda Sat.
Midnight snack with JollyJules and MiniVin @ Salam.
Met up with Desmond on Sunday for bfast and lunch.
Tinted my spotlight.
New staff training on Monday and will continue till Friday. Dunno how she'll cope.
Also, I'll be in KL this weekend with ArifGigo and maybe BadCharn.

Reading The Traveller now. Midway. Interesting but nothing exceptional. Worth a read.

Sorry for the short update. I'm really sleepy now and it's only 10.35. I hate workdays.

*YAWN*

Saturday, November 29, 2008

.perbelanjaan melampau.

Gua rasa belanja gua sudah melampau.

Gua tengok jam tangan Bell & Ross Limited Edition. Lepas diskaun, RM10,000. Plus minus le.

Benda cam ini pun gua teringin nak beli, cam mana boleh tak melampau?
Nasib baik gua pandai, Batu Ferringhi ada produk imitasi Gred-A.
Malam ini gua lepak kat Batu Ferringhi.

----------------------------------

Last pic of Maskara Shorties Reunion from Anis.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

.sexy banned.

Great!

Yoga declared 'haram' for Muslims
"Yoga - practices that involve physical movements, worshiping and chanting - is officially prohibited (

MCPX
haram) in Islam, the National Fatwa Council declared today."

Thank god, has it not been the National Fatwa Council (NFC) I'm sure hordes of Muslims would convert to Hinduism after being enlightened by Yoga's superior poses. I mean, who wouldnt? Look at that mean back flip posture. I would definitely be enlightened. Let's look at it this way, I would also convert to Hinduism if my wife's staggering lards of infected tummy can be cured by slow motion provocative postures.

I was pretty pissed off because the NFC did not take action earlier. I mean, the consequences are already showing. Throngs of Muslims are invading temples in Batu Caves in hope of getting their ass converted. I think they failed but nevertheless, imagine having part of your ass practicing Hinduism. How cool would that be?

BTW, have you NFC members not noticed alot of young people nowadays getting their legs converted to Christianity? Just because they're young and rebellious doesn't mean you should neglect them. Go visit Bukit Bintang and have a look-see. Their legs are being demonised. Shuffling.. wtf is that?

They move their epilepsy infected legs on the roadwalk hoping to woo chicks. I wish tomorrow's news would read:

Shuffling declared 'haram' for Muslims
"Shuffle- practices that involve physical movements, epilepsy imitations and severe OCD- is officially prohibited (
MCPX
haram
) in Islam, the National Fatwa Council declared today."

Thank god for NFC, or I wouldn't be sure what would happen to wayward Muslims in this country. Glad they're here to babysit them all to the right path right?

Saturday, November 22, 2008

.b'fast roti canai.

Gua sudah sampai.

Kawan gua belum sampai lagi. Haram jadah mereka ini, kata pukul 8.00 pagi. Gua ingat gua sudah lambat sampai 8.35 tapi batang hidung mereka masih hilang. Nasib gua tak sampai pukul 8. Kalo tak, sudah terkapai-kapai mulut gua mencaci mereka sekarang.

Kalo boleh, ku rasa breakfast pun tak payah lah makan. Siap skip sampai lunch aje. Baru macho (tak ada duit tu alasan tak nampak macho aje. Beli baju baru? Tak macho baju tu. Makan kat Starbucks? Tak macho lah, baik pekena teh tarik Mamak Ali aje.)

Tak macholah duduk sorang sorang dekat kedai kopi tunggu kawan. Kalo tunggu makwe gua takpe, ni tunggu batang pulak. Tak pe, gua sabar. Kan orang kata sabar itu separuh daripada iman. Whatever le.

Sambil gua duduk tu, terfikir pulak gua nak layan sebatang rokok. Tapi gua dah berhenti.

Actually, gua takde duit beli rokok. Gua rasa rokok itu membazir. Lebih hebat daripada minyak kereta. Duit minyak boleh turun, duit rokok sejak gua darjah satu sampai sekarang tak pernah turun lagi.

Gua tahan, pekena teh tarik dulu.

Gua nak panggil roti canai. Mak cik itu tak endahkan gua. Dah berkali kali dia lalu tepi gua? Gua tak cukup hensemkah?

Gua check pakaian, kaca mata hitam, semua package gua sudah buat. Takkan nak suruh gua tanggalkan baju? Tak boleh makcik, ini kedai kopi tepi jalan... bukan bilik I.

Sudah 15 minit gua masih belum order roti gua lagi. Gua berfikir lama, macam mana nak menarik perhatian makcik ini.

"Kak! Roti satu." gua jerit.

Makcik itu mengangguk. 2 minit kemudian, makcik datang dengan roti gua.

Gua senyum. Gua rasa, gua boleh menipu demi roti canai. Konfirm gua masuk neraka nanti.

p/s: I'll be in Klang/KL on the 6th and 7th December. Come to think of it, I'm getting tired of KL.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

.updates today.

1. Back from KL last Sunday. Was pretty tired. SillySeng is back for this week.
2. Had a gathering yesterday at Sunday's Cafe. Wonderful event. PeskyPet told us that JustJJ's birthday was over. We felt so guilty. Dun worry, I smell a party coming soon this weekend or next.
On a side note, I'm beginning to hate KornyKhoo cause he never calls to cancel. He just skips the event eventhough he made RSVP.
3. I'll be heading down to KL later in the morning, probably around 4 am. Will be sleepy.
4. Hajar's wedding is this weekend. Can't wait to see everyone once again.

The end.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

.punched by Ironman.

We were at Pavillion, sitting at the lounge area in front of Prada and Gucci or whatever.

There was a couple sitting in front of us. Directly opposite.

We noticed them. The guy was normal, short hair, soft looking.. typical. The girl was ok, just that she had a caved in face.

After 2 minutes, SillySeng said "Eh, you see the girl in front of me"

"Yeah, why?"

"She looks like SimplySue if SimplySue was punched in the face by Ironman"

I laughed out loud. So typical of him to describe someone in the most effective way.

Monday, November 17, 2008

.President of USA.

I asked him who's the current President of USA.

In his attempt to look outdated and impervious to current issues.

He said "George Clinton".

Clearly, his attempt failed.

Friday, November 14, 2008

.need and like.

For the longest time, I wanted to be cool. Wanted to travel the world, be an artist. Live life day after day scraping enough just to get by. I guess its all perception. I was never good in maths, at least never THAT good.

Now I have a 9 to 5 job (9 to 6 to be exact), a steady income, responsibilies.. or rather burdens. I realize its not easy to change. Its not easy to leave everything and go do something I like.

So I'm taking things one step at a time. Doing things little by little. Knowing that I have the choice to be responsible and at the same time, embark on something I enjoy.. part time.

p/s: me in KL for a couple of days. hopefully, will bring SillySeng back with me.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

.peluh Tok Rimau.

Blog ini berhenti sekejap untuk soalan penting tahun 2008.

Gua cakap Tok Rimau kontrol peluh.
Tok Rimau cakap dia manusia biasa. Berpeluh gak. Tapi peluh dia bau strawberry.
Gua musykil. Apa agaknya bau kentut dia?
p/s: just when I though Malaysian productions were getting good. Along comes Antoo Fighter to destroy all hopes I ever had.

----------------------------------------------------

I'm reading Turning Thirty by Mike Gayle. It seems like it wont be long before I myself would come at that turning point. Turning Thirty... I wonder how different it would be from now.

Would I have a wife and maybe a kid to call my own?
Would I have a steady multimillion dollar business?
Would I have travelled the world?
Would I be happy?

Or would I just be here, in front of this same exact PC at the same exact place with minimal pay increment.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

.KL Trip - Conclusion.

*click on image for full view*







Tuesday, November 11, 2008

.those were the days.

*click on image for full view*

its amazing how years pass by.
so stop ranting and lets go celebrate life!

Saturday, November 8, 2008

.Maskara Shorties Detour.

Malam sudah menjelang, hari pun sudah gelap. Gua pakai baju putih favourite gua. Gua takde date dengan makwe malam ini. Gua mahu berjumpa lecturer gua. Dia bukan perempuan. Lelaki.

Bukan apa, gua tak nak kalah kepada 'charisma' dia. Sampai kat sana, gua tengok dia layan tetamu. Tersenyum gua, mengingatkan gua kepada masa masa language camp dulu.

November 1 8.30 malam adalah malam skreening Maskara Shorties di Rumah Pena. Gua dah cakap, kalau lu tak pi, lu lugi (aksen Bahasa Cina keluar dah).

Gua sampai dan mak aii.... terkejut dengan bilangan orang yang mengunjunginya.. bukan main banyak sampai hampir nak kalah konsert Nasyid Fasha Sandha. Huhuhu. Makan minum di sini free. Awek cantik serve. Gua tonyeh aje apa yang ada dalam mulut.

Tak sampai 10 minit, gua dah berpeluh. Busuk menusuki satu arena. Tok G pandai, dia pakai deodoran kat satu badan, sebab itu tak nampak sangat peluh dia. Tapi busuk tu busuk juga. Dia kontrol macho, kalo peluh itu boleh kontrol, memang dia kontrol jugak. Sebab dia selebriti, filem dia dah nak ditayangkan.

Gua layan filem dia. Kami semua layan filem dia.

Berapa inci diameter agaknya hidung Tok G masa itu?

Kosmo 1, Kosmo 2. Review Grip Phone 1, Review Grip Phone 2.

The gang minus HappyHunny and PreggieShima.

Friday, November 7, 2008

.today.

it's 9.20.

I just wish it'd all go away and leave me alone. I feel terrible.

p/s: on a different note, some people are just retarded.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

.KL Trip - Part 2.

For MASKARA SHORTIES. Click HERE.

*click on pics to enlarge. original image size rawks*









*next post : KL Road Trip DETOUR - Maskara Shorties*

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

.KL Trip - Part 1.

*click on pics to enlarge. original image size rawks*












Sunday, November 2, 2008

.updates.

Gua sudah balik. Gambar ada. Biar gua kompile dulu, nanti bertaburan macam tahi lembu yang baru dipijak.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

.minor updates.

1. i finished the final episodes of TVB series Four and Last One Standing. I know, my life sucks. Yours are all da bomb wtf who cares.

2. Played futsal and sprained my knee. So dumb wtf. Then proceeded to AutoCity with Jack and Ajepz for lepak lepak borak borak. Saw Raymond Lam there wtf never sing also.

3. Celebrated JollyJules' birthday and NottyNit leaving Malaysia migrating to Thai lol wtf its so not true. Met up with lots of ex schoolmates. Haven meet them for like one day. But prior to Raya, it was like 8 years. Among the people who were cool enough to get RSVP invitations are Hajar, Hajar + 1 (Anas) Maizatul, Aen, Aen + 1 (Rudy), Khoo, Khoo + 1 (Kelly), Khairul, Nit, Mars, Jules, Seng, Me (lazy to change name wtf who cares). After the party, a few of us headed over to AutoCity and then back to McDonalds until 4 am.

4. Deepavali was full. Thanks to Privina and Thanes. No usual open house at Puva's place though wtf miss the food.

Next week, my reports from KL hopefully with pictures this time k?

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

.my maskara.

I'll be in KL on November the 1st for Maskara Shorties.


Maskara shorties is one of those things we feel could never be as good as foreign production. But its good, done by many great people with so much talent that they sometimes scare me.

Give them a chance, let's together-gether rock this place.

but first of all, anyone by any chance know a real easy way to go to RUMAH PENA?

---------------------------------

it has been a rough week. troubles are brewing and work is piling endlessly.
I felt like everything just went wrong on Monday and Tuesday... and today.

Work was not done in time, deadlines were not met... somehow, it felt like university. it felt like one of those days when things go bad and turns worse. except we expect it to get better and it always does. not this time.

this time, things just kept getting worse. its like seeing a falling plate. things go slow and you somehow know you've slipped but no matter how you fling your hand trying to stop the momentum, hoping in some miracle way you could catch it before it hits the ground... you fail. and today i felt that certain helplessness.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

.dictionary of faces.

Fuckface (adj)
1. A person with a penis for his nose and is of such hideous origin that even his mother abandoned him. Usually applied to the male gender only.
2. A facial expression utilized during sexual intercourse.
3. A person of great inconvenience to mankind and a waste of nature's resources. Generally he is an environmental pollution.

E.G. "Hey, fuckface... get out of my fucking way before I bitchslap you from here to China."

Dickhead (adj)
1. Usually denotes a bald man with elongated necks enabling him to ejaculate spit by thrusting his neck up and down.
2. A relatively unknown person who you have just met and has a great distaste towards.
3. A very ugly person.

E.G. "That dickhead just made a move on your girl mate"

Cumface (adj)
1. A very ugly and hideous person whom you have a distaste towards.
2. Usually a female person with male jizz on her face. Sometimes due to the act of Bukake.
3. A person with facial features resembling the freezing face you make when you cum.

E.G. "You were born with a cumface Ali. Its nothing to be ashamed of, we all have it. Yours is just... urm... permanent."

Friday, October 17, 2008

.you know?

you know when guys pee. they flush. and then they pee that tidbit again...
and they can't flush?
what to do then?

you know when you go to a public toilet, and there's people at the other cubicle.
you pee to the sides of the wall so that the other person wouldn't listen on you.
cause then they'd know how many times your dumb brain THOUGHT you were finished peeing.

you know when the car crashes. and the air bag pops out?
that feeling of being shoved into an air bag?
i wish those were breasts. wouldn't that be great?
i'd call them breastbags.

you know when you take a bath with your wife/gf to enhance your sexual relationship?
girls would think its awesome and all.
you'd both be back massaging, rubbing soaps all over.
its all romantic and sensual.
until the guy pees.

guys pee while bathing all the time.
no, they can control it... they just choose not to.

some girls on the other hand... take the time to sit down on the toilet bowl after bathing.
others just squat down.
don't think she's giving you a blowjob just cause she's squatting.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

.my country.

it is with a sad heart as i watch the political proceedings of this country. we have progressed for 51 years and although I've seen our share of turmoil and tragedy, none is as disheartening as these past few months.

thinking back, I've witnessed the highlands tragedy, tsunami, reformasi during Anwar's detention, 1997 economic turmoil among the many. however, these past few months we've witnessed stones unturned. what was once hidden and damp under those stones are being shown light once again. greed and lust is empowering but the faces are being identified. we've succesfully put faces to these words. i believe with great power comes greater greed. i am no exception. i do not blame our government for such abuse of power, i blame the people for letting them be too comfortable in their seats.

the unlawful detention of a chinese reporter and MP Teresa Kok was uncalled for. it was a disgrace to Malaysia. It was a time of pure darkness when people thought all freedom and justice is being contorted. our freedom felt like it lived in small boxes donated to us out of generosity, it was a keeping, not a right. the detention of RPK was necessary for the government as they deem him as a threat. He was sharp and he spoke his mind. A double edged sword. However, no human who have not killed or planned to kill another human being should be detained with prejudice and without trial.

now, we've reached another stage of dark times. with the economic turmoil and the political uncertainty, it seems like the person who will be at helm could be another face we put "not only" to the words greed and lust but also to the word conspirator. evil at times like this flourish.
at present time of writing, he is still taking his time. press conferences are answered in dodgy manners, questions are being answered with more questions.

"What do you think/see?"
"Was there anything conclusive?"
"Was there anything pointing to abuse of power?"

Nothing is conclusive. but the people is not blind. We see you at the helm one day and we are scared. Not only because we have labeled you as all of the above but because of who we imagine will be in power and calling the shots. they say birds of a feather flock together right?

and then there is also the calling of the unwise spending of money. the sum is not HUGE or ABYSMAL but it mattered at a time when the world is dark. You seem to have no qualms pumping money out of the country at an excess than what is needed. Was it worth it? Was your greed empowering? Did you think no one would find out like all the other times? Did it feel good pocketing all those money and looking at our country fall? They say a civilized and well-mannered society starts with the family. I think it starts with a man... it starts in small components because these small components blend together to make a country. Did you put yourself before the country?

You broke our heart and although we might've misjudged you, we might've wrongly accused you... It didn't matter what we want, you are just not ready to give up all those power yet for the country. You will fight through right? You will fight tooth and nail for power.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

.wrong side of the bed.

waking up at 6 is not really my forte. I tried to force my eyes but it seems to have a will on its own.

and then its 7.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

.ProjekKami.

go watch if you like the tv series.
damn nice wtf but the ending makes it impossible to have "KAMI 2" the way I would've loved it.




others:
KAMI the movie trailer
Mawar Khayalan by Laila's Lounge
Pari Pari Di Bawah Angin by Meet Uncle Hussain

support local production. get original. they're quite good actually. serious.

p/s: I'm looking for Sepi and Cinta. If you have it, pls pls PLS do tell me.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

.things that baffle me.

Part 3.

continuation from part 1 and part 2.

facebook whores who spends all their time playing nonsensical java games.
who the fuck does this anymore? fess up. personally i think facebook is overrated. networking or no shit, they give people the illusion that we can interact and high-five each other or throw chickens at each other without any eye contact. we can even lick all our friends wtf. what the dumbfuck kinda interaction is that?

we all think facebook is the platform where we can start all over again fresh from friendster. with all those albums and shit. well, guess what... i think the albums are nice. but the games? the games which you keep inviting me 10 times over and over? there's a reason why i declined them in the first place piehole. now i don't even look at my invites. i dun want to play medieval warrior or pokemon adventure. heck i dont even want to enter your group of "Feed a child with a click" shit. cant you get it through your fucking thick skull?

people who dont answer their calls and dont call back.
whats the use of a fucking handphone if you don't pick it up? fine, if you're like bathing, masturbating. having sex with your dog. i totally understand your predicament but at least have the fucking decency to call back after you're done with whatever sexual activity you have. i called you for a reason and although the reason might be to talk bullshit, but i fucking CALLED you to talk about bullshit. see how important that is?

Taiwanese Hokkien Movies.
I believe every living auntie who's above 45 years old and who doesn't have a life would definitely love the series. But seriously, I cant stomach it. And I have to sit in for it every fucking day from 6 to 7 pm cause my grandma's been hogging for it and demanding i switched it on every fucking day. Even on fucking Saturdays and Sundays, she wants to make sure. I never really bothered with it last time cause I would really just skip it. But now, it's taking over my 6 to 7 pm and causing me endless headaches with their poor acting and silly accents. And all those fucking guys in the fucking movie somehow have their slick hair combed back every fucking series. And their language... oh my fucking god... how could they put that on TV. btw, I'm hokkien but you don't see Singaporean Hokkien sounding like a lame arse.

Fucking MLM and Direct Sales.
They give you this bullshit talk about having your own business and running your own profits and all kinds of enterprenual bullshit but the fact of the matter is, you're selling someone's fucking product and working for them for a percentage of their income. It's a small fucking percentage believe me, no matter what pudgy fucking bullshit they try to shove down your throat. Its all OK, I buy stuffs from MLM and direct sales. Hell my mom was involved in numerous shits like these. But the fact of the matter is, they're fucking annoying like facebook invites... they keep coming on and on with the invites wtf.

DSLR owners calling themselves a professional photographer.
every fucking person holding a DSLR are calling themselves professional photographers. Just because they can do some editing on Photoshop and take countless amount of digital pictures and selecting the best ones. fucking retards have no training, have no art sense, have nothing. they just click and choose. it helps that the images are of damn quality and it helps that the print outs are kinda free (no need for film wtf).

end note.
if you feel offended, just press Alt + F4. Bye my filthy bitch.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

.guling atau gulung?

"You tak tau siapa DancingDodi?" tanya HappyHunny.

"Dah tak ingat" jawab aku.

HappyHunny cuba menjelaskan ciri-ciri yang mungkin membolehkan aku ingat kembali kawan aku ini. Aku cuba, tetapi tidak berjaya.

Dia berkata lagi, "She's quite chubby?"

Aku tak tahu kenapa tapi imej "sebelum" dalam iklan langsing badan muncul dalam fikiran aku.

"Oh... patutlah aku tak ingat" jawab aku.

"DancingDodi tinggal dekat ngan KL aje. Tiup pun sampai."

"Betul ka? Kalau aku tiup tak sampai.. aku gulungkan dia ke KL." aku gelak.

"Gulung?" tanya HappyHunny. Kemudian dia ketawa terbahak-bahak, "You mean guling. Ko ingat dia permaidani ke?".

Aku rasa dari telefon ajaibnya, dia tahu muka aku merah malu. Dia gelak lagi. Tak berhenti-henti dan semakin kuat. Aku tunggu hingga keadaan reda, sampai HappyHunny teresak-esak dengan ketawanya.


Kemudian aku meneruskan perbualan dalam Bahasa Inggeris.

Monday, October 6, 2008

.nama kereta.

Hari itu aku berjalan dengan AbsolutAlvin.

Dia bertanya aku "You namakan kereta you Suzie?"

Aku menjawab "Brand dia Suzuki jadi singkatannya Suzie lar. Bukannya nama spesial pun."

Alvin gelak tersengih.

Tapi dalam hati, aku teringin nak panggil kereta aku Shadow atau Macho, mungkin jugak ZimMobile ala Batmobile.

Aku tekan kekunci kereta "tik tak" dan kami masuk ke dalam ZimMobile. Mana butang eject untuk passenger tepi?

Friday, October 3, 2008

.taking a break.